Adieu 2014

Before I start to end this year, I promise to finish my Emotion-Reports about the G.L.A.M.S Concert @ Contopia and the Satsuki concert this month. The reasons why I couldn´t finish them is, that this year was stressful like hell.

I was not motivated since the announcement of the disbanding of Anonymous Confederate Ensemble. This demotivation stayed until now. Just a little light of hope, made of Nimos voice and his endless hart working will saved me from not giving up on myself.

I had a Bachelorthesis to end, searching a new Flatmate, taking care of my old flatmate and helping her over her broken heart, calculate the money, getting good marks for the Master of Science application and then...in the weakest, most emotional und most unstable condition I had to deal with the stubborn behaviour of people who I called friends, who I trusted, who I believed in.

I had to learn to break up, to go on alone...this year was full of break ups and dissappointing experiences.
At least I´ve realized, that you can not trust people as easiely as I thought and you can not give them more than one chance. And I´ve realized that it is better to be quite and patient than loud and angry.
This year was so full of dissapointing people, that I nearly loose my trust in the human beings...but than..there are always some wonderful musicians I want to thank a lot this year, because they brought back the trust in humans:

My Year started with an exhibition in Paris. I went to Paris the first time after 20 years or so, so I was excited. But more thrilling than this town, was the exhibition. Spending a day together with a japanese musician, surrounded by his Art, was breathtaking. The first time in my life I had the chance to watch a musician for a long time. Again, when I thought about watching him the hole day, I feel excited. It was like studing something you really want to get to know closer. And really, I still want to find out what´s the difference between a normal people and a musician like him. Mikaru-sama was completely different than I expected. He tried so carefully to come closer to me, because I am extremely shy in front of musicians and tried to hide myself behind a friend. How easy he could make me loosing my fear.
His close friend Tetsuto-sama, is such a heartwarming person. We all enjoyed very much spending time with him and Mikaru-sama.
When I meet both again at Contopia (Emotion-Report will follow as I have time) I also was getting to know Syu-sama for the first time. Do you know the saying "all good thinks are 3?"  In the case of G.L.A.M.S it is really true. Syu-sama was the last puzzle to complete this project. He is a sunshine! A little bit shy maybe, but you can see him shining on stage, like the sun on a beautiful morning. He is one of the musicians I can easily talk to, I don´t know why ♥

One day before I met Mikaru-sama and friends again, I finally, after 3 years, met my musicial father, the Master of Music, again. When Kamijo-sama announced that he will gave a concert in Paris I was happy on two ways. First, I can visit the most lovely town in Europe again. My beloved Paris, I was crying when I had to leave you in february. Second, I could see the man again, who cleaned my soul and let it grow to a beautiful flower. It´s hart to describe in words, how it feels to stand in front of him. It´s like you were 4 years old and your father was on a long journey, and after a long time he comes back, to take you in his arm and told you, that everything is fine now. And really, Kamijo-sama changed a lot. From the proud, young Prince, looking down from his castle, to a lovely man, with a warm heart, looking at us like a father on his beloved children. He stayed proud, but in another way. I love his warm and loving site, the way he looks at me. I was standing there, shy, speachless, full of fear to make a mistake in front of a man, I wish I could really be his daugther. At first it was just, because I would like to work for Sherow Artist Society, I want to work for him, be a musician in his hands, because I trust him, blind. But especially on this one day he was, even just by his music, a father like I wish I really had. If you have one biological and 2 stepfathers, you dosen´t care about genetical or social factors. Especially if after christmas you had the feeling that your biological father wants to manipulate you again, to hate your mother and your first stepfather just tries to get her back with your help. Yes, I met my best friend and what I just told her was "Is Kamijo-sama the only one who treats me like a daugther this year?". And yes, just with the help of his music and his charisma.
he gives me the emotional power I needed in the 2nd part of this year. Now I will meet him again in 2015. I am glad about seeing him again so soon, because I miss him, I need a new portion of emotional power and I just want to spend one evening more with my father, even if I cry the hole night.
At least, because of him, I could make a decision, which I don´t regret. For more than one year, my heart was just a chaos of emotions. i tried to love in a way, everyone would be okay with. Than, kamijo-sama released his first Minialbum and than his album "Heart". The music cleaned not only my soul, but my heart, too. So I exactly know now how and what I feel and what to do with it.
Sure, 82,6% of the people will disapprove this, if they would know, because this is what everyone would do. But I don´t regret anything. Call me crazy, but I made my desicion and I am happy with it.
My heart is closed now, for every man who tries to make me loving him and only one special clef can open it again.

Than, there was my only hope on earth and even if we couldn´t meet, he did a lot for me this year. I remember, that I had to work on the 29th of April this year. I didn´t wanted to, but I need the money. And on every breake I had, I was watching his tweets and blogentries and tried not to cry. The day of the last concert of Anonymous Confederate Ensemble was so unrealistic and destroying, that I just layed down on the ground of my room, after work. I had to smile the hole day, even if it was hart, so I lost all my energy at the end of this day. This was one of the most terrible days of the year.
But after that, he stayed. He was there, like nothing happened. I could read the "Nimornings" I loved so much every morning. Nimo-sama was the one this year who teached me, to give everything, but never give up. So I was happy, every single day, I could read something from him. Watching him, announcing lives and events, motivated me every day to stand up, no matter how hart it was. Next to Kamijo-sama, he is always the emotional support I needed, like the air to breath. Nimo-sama is very different from all the musicians. Even if he is the god of rain, he is also the sunshine in my life. He is, like Kamijo-sama, what I need to grow to a wonderful and strong flower. But also, i never saw a musician like him and it isn´t possible describe how it feels to listen to his voice, no matter if he is speaking or singing.
Maybe you couldn´t imagine, but I think my musicial Father (Kamijo-sama) and my big brother (Nimo-sama) are on a weird way similar to each other. Harrtworking, not to be beaten, passionate and charismatic. When he announced the release of his Album in March 2015, my heart skipped a beat, so much that I had the feeling to faint. I really needed an hour to realize it. It was one of the best christmaspresents this year. Hopefully I get the chance to give him something back in 2015.
I know he maybe doesn´t know how important he was for me this year and I know the chance, that he reads this entry is small. But I would like to thank you the most, this year, Nimo-sama. Because you teached me how to fight, you showed me what I have to do, to live a good life where I regret nothing. You are always patient, lovely and friendly when I have my fangirling moments and you give me a reason to get up every morning. This year I lost a lot and I was very close to moments, where I could loose more than I want. It was you who saved me in this moments. I don´t know how you make it, maybe it´s a little bit the fault of my own. But if it´s so, it´s just because of the music you created in 4 years and the way you go on. It´s a clef to my own emotional power, I needed to survive this year. So, Thank you very much!!!

And thank you to my friends, from the Tea-to-go-Party, to support me!!! What would I do without you in Hamburg and in Paris in February! ;^;
Thank you to my best friend Christin, that you love me, how I am since 15 years! I can´t wait to celebrate the new year with you, honey ♥
And thank you to Cathy, for this wonderful time with you in Paris and the tiem we spend for organising everything ♥
Just, thank you all, for helping me this year: Miriam, Kitty, Kevin, Tama...you ALL!!! I love you ♥

And Thank you to the persons who treated me wrong. For this experiences. You don´t know how much stronger I am now!

Lovely greetings,

Kimie

4th July: Throne

I am sorry for writing so late,
but finding words for a concert of Kamijo is just impossible.
 
At first:
how can a man, who becomes 39 years old this year look so beautiful. It´s not because of the hole make up he maybe wears on stage (it didn´t look so)...there are details in his face, in the way he moves, the way he behaves which are just beautiful.
All the little fine lines in his face. They reveal days, months and years of hard work with passion and they look so beautiful on him. His smile was warm, lovely, honest. Everytime I saw him smile my heart was begging for more.
He moved smooth, noble, with proud but not arrogant, not a second. How can a man be so proud in such a honest way?
There is just beauty on him, warm and wonderful beauty. What a difference when I remember him 3 years ago! I can´t describe him better, you have to see him and you will unerstand it. He is just a breathtaking beauty.

That he create his songs as honest as his beauty is you coudl also experience. Everything fits perfectly. But I have to speak out a little Warning:

If you are extremely sensitive, easy to influence by music and you have an open heart...you should be careful or you will become addicted to Kamijo!!!!!!

For me it´s definitely too late. He sang "Tresór" and "Grazioso" and I was the little child I am always when I think of him. In contrast to earlier he looks like a father of ALL of his fans in such moments, such songs. His calming voice is like a tender caressing on you. Do you all remember this moments? when you played in your room, or outsite and Daddy came home from work? This warm moment when he pics you up and gave you a kiss when you where a little girl, not older than 3 or 4 years? That´s how it feels for me sometimes if I met Kamijo.
Yeah, I know it is weird, but just try to remember and maybe you will understand.

But this man also has his dark sites, strong sites...his hole character is like a garden of hundreds of different roses. He is also a strong Master, a King of his own country and he reigns over his nation with a staunchness to his fans that makes you speachless. His songs, the story behind it can make you strong just by visiting this one concert.
Also he makes you feel the past better than any historylesson about the french revolution.
"Symphony of the Vampire" and all the songs he put around them gave you another feeling for what happened. In historylessons we just learn what happened and why, but no one thinks about the feelings, about the little, young Louis Charles... 
He was a child, he was innocent and just what others did destroyed this little young heart. On the concert you could see it in his eyes. Kamijo was thinking a lot about what happened. I can not explain how he made this but he was able to make history real and emotional in his own way.

I don´t wanted it but when he started with "Adagio of the full moon" I started crying. It´s because of  Kamijo himself and about what stands behind this song and what you see in the PV. Also it is because of another musician I adore and I miss him so much. So my eyes were moving between Shinya-sama and Kamijo-sama because of this reason and my feelings went up and down and I couldn´t hide my tears. I am sure this is maybe hard to understand. But if you look at all my blog entries maybe you will understand.
"Throne" pushed me up again. It felt like celebrating a king and the future which will come. I love this last part of the Symphony and I love it to sing it out loud. It fits so greate to this man. I wanted to celebrate him every single day of my life!!!

His Supports also were fantastic!! I think I have a little crush on Ikuo-sama, which is really a fascinating bassist and a really, really handsome man.
Sometimes it was hard to concentrate on Kamijo-sama if there is standing this little beauty in front auf you :)
At least I was happy to meet Shinya-sama, who was a friend of the first japanese musician I started to adore. Even if it´s hard in July to push away some painful memories, it was good to see him. And if anyone wants to tell me that this man couldn´t play drums...I swear he or she will regret to speak out this lie. Shinya-sama is a  fantastic drummer and no one fits better to Kamijo-sama as a support drummer than Shinya. Even if he seems to be very shy and a little bit shocked that so many people were celebrating him, because it was Kamijo-samas day and not Shinya-samas. I hope he isn´t worried, because he can´t do anything against the decision of his fans to show him how much they love him. If support or not, fans are loving and they show it and it is good how it is.
Before I forgot: I was smiling most of the time. Since I saw him for the first time at the concert I had to smile at him. This man is just making me smile when I see him ♥ Yes I am a child, a little girl: curious of the world, not thinking about sadness and happy about her life..just because of this one concert.


I believe that this video describes the impressive I have from him.
He changed a lot since all the time which past and now I adore him much more than before. I watched every breath he toke, every move he made, I was listening to every single Note he was singing, every word he said, just to learn from him, to become just nearly as fantastic as he is.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8EU08IBKZc

With Love,


Kimie

 

4 Golden Years

My Dear Hearties, My Dearest Crew of Anonymous Confederate Ensemble,

I am not someone who can describe moments like this with just a few words, but I want to try my best to make it short for all of us. You all mean very much to me and on this 4th anniversary I want to thank you all, the band and the Fans.

4 Years are now over and because of A this years where the most wonderful in my live. I´ve never meet such a sozial, lovely and friendly fanbase. Even if we all don´t know each other we all seems to be friends. It´s like a network which goes around the world and showes that we all are one. I was visiting a lot of different concerts, but just on a concert of A I had the chance to take the hand of my friends, and to enjoy it with them together. This 21 month later I was getting to know a lot of new people and friends, just because of this one band. people which really make me believe that they aren´t false friends. Something which wasn´t really easy to see before I was getting to know the band. So thank you very much, Hearties and Friends that you are here, so that we all can believe in the good, no matter if there is light or darkness. 

But such a wonderful fanbase can´t exist without a wonderful band! 
I can´t stop remembering the day I was getting to know A. A friend of mine sent me the musicvideo of Vanilla sky and, curious like I am, I was watching it. There was a feeling of fondness by watching it and than I was falling down from the chair. My mother just looked at me and I couldn´t explain to her why I was falling down. Today I could, for sure. 
A are really a band which is different from all I was listening before. And I am sure there will be no other band which could be like this. No one else can put the hole world on music. No one else can create songs which can guide you through the whole life, like this. Even if it´s having fun with my friends or my familie, or a difficult decision I have to make. Even if something goes wrong or right, there is alsways their music. No other band could do it and at the end it seems to be so easy for A to change the life of Fans, to let them all grow up to wonderful strong human. A doesn´t just make music and give concerts, there is much more behind it. A whole world for this human who want to understand how precious the own life and the life of others is. 
Pirates are traveling around to find treasures and our pirates found it, together with us. For me personally we found the most precious treasures in the world: Love in all it´s thousands of different ways. No matter if it´s between lovers, friends, familymembers, strangers, for yourselfe, for the music or for your country or for something else.  And this treasure is it, and will it ever be, what makes us being strong and able to realize everything we want.

I am sure there is something like a red thread of destiny on the pinkie finger, which connects us to each other. I believe in it as much as I can, so noone of us will ever be alone.
Let us celebrate together this wonderful 4 golden years. I am thankful for everything the band created: for Rookie Fiddler´s creativity and his tireless use of hundreds of instruments, for Toshi´s wonderful and sophisticated bassplay, which at least reached the hearts of a lot of women and warmed it, for Mucho Gracias wonderful guitarplay, which he plays with so much passion and love and which is one of the best I was ever listening to. And I am (as a singer) thankful for Nimo´s incredible, unique voice, which filled every song with the right feelings like no other vocalist could do it, which calmed me down when I am restless and pent-up and makes me everytime standing up and continue singing.
I wish you a wonderful 4th anniversary and good luck for the next years which will follow, no matter what you all want to do.


With love

Kimie


PS: A picture from the most fantastic concert I`ve ever had ♥ Even if I am looking terrible because I was nervous as hell!!!!! ♥